Friday, March 30, 2007

Stop Staring At Me (I Think).


I find the human face fascinating, and it's very hard for me to not give people a good, quick, direct-in-the-face stare when I see them whether or not I've ever met them before. Strangers are better than people I know, and weird looking strangers with ugly facial hair or interesting scars are the cream of the crop.

Sure it's rude, but so is picking your nose and flicking at someone, and all of my friends and family have been doing that for YEARS.

New York so far has been the weird-faces-to-look-at depository that I hoped it would be; countless waves of ugly, gnarled trolls mixed in with symmetrically perfect and exfoliated magazine faces...I'm like a kid in a candy store only instead of candy, the store carries various severed heads. I think there's a place like that in Midtown.

In a span of less than 20 minutes today, I saw 3 people who were intensely cross-eyed. It was as if their noses were refrigerator doors and their eyeballs magnets. It was as if there was a sink-hole between their eyes. All had either the best or the worst peripheral vision possible...I'm not really sure how it works.

"Have any of you ever had a problem seeing the hidden image in those 3-D Magic Eye Posters?"

"Yeah, I figured not."

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